My name is Jen. I am the mom of four daughters, the wife of a software engineer, and a SharePoint Bitch working for The Man in San Antonio, Texas. Want to know more about me than you probably should? Visit About Jen.
Yesterday was the birthday of one of the greatest presidents we have ever had. Regardless of your politics to deny Ronald Reagan his achievements and what he represented to this world is simply living your life with your head firmly buried in your ass. As I watch the inaugural speech Dave in Texas was kind enough to link yesterday I find myself looking around on youtube for a copy of Fuknut’s speeches, you know the ones that everyone proclaims him to be so fucking articulate in. I cannot find a single one that can stand up against this one. Where is the gravitas? Where is the fucking passion for making this country great? It simply doesn’t exist anymore in our government. There is a line in this speech from Reagan where he talks of the price of freedom often being very high, but we the American people have never been afraid to pay it. It was true then, and I believe with the exception of the pussies in charge, it is still true. The problem? It is now considered a great evil to think this way. Understanding freedom, self reliance, and thinking for yourself is actually considered narrow minded just 30 short years after this speech was given. How do things change so fast?
People always talk about the Hope and Change of Fuknut. All I hear is doom, gloom, pessimism, and scolding. You should listen to this speech if you are my age you will remember it as a child, if you are older you will remember it as literally what Hope and Change is suppose to be, if you are young and have never heard Reagan speak, then please listen to this and maybe you will understand what all of us “old folks” are so damn pissed off about.
The Left would have you believe we are all the harbingers of doom, negativity, and the unenlightened world view. The reality? We are all that is left of the optimism of America. Reagan was many things, but foremost me, he was an optimist. He believed unwaveringly in the intrinsic good of Americans and held dear faith that freedom would always win over tyranny. The act of optimism in the face of the world he inherited is a staggering achievement. To believe so wholeheartedly that this nation is great enough to overcome one of the worst economic times in modern history is the epitome of Hope and Change.
We live once again in a political climate where elected leaders believe they can tax us into prosperity. I had one of those light bulb moments earlier when I was thinking about what to write here. You know, one of those, “Well duh, jennifer” moments. You know why they think they can tax us into prosperity? Why they think that bloating the government is going to give us prosperity? Well, I will tell you if you are slow on the uptake like me today. It isn’t that they are being stupid. It isn’t that they think all this taxation and government spending is going to push us back to a robust and growing economy. Helloooo, that isn’t what they want. Their prosperity doesn’t include any of those things. It is as many more eloquent people have been saying for decades, prosperity to the Liberal mind is about dependence not independence. It is about regulation not free markets and economies. It is about fitting in not rising above. Success is not judged by doing extraordinary things; success to the Liberal is celebrating mediocrity. It is about everyone getting a trophy just for showing up, not for winning, not for excellence. It is about providing excuses for failure instead of incentives for success. It is about being beta not alpha. It is about nothing ever being special.
I miss special things. I miss the celebration of special people. Barak Obama is not fucking special! Let me say it again in case someone out there didn’t hear me scream it. HE. IS. NOT. FUCKING. SPECIAL! He is average in the worst possible way. He is not a beacon of hope unless the hope you have in your heart is to live in a world which celebrates mediocrity and being like everyone else. Gee, I know I raise my children everyday with they hope that they will be just like all their friends.
The left revels in the creativity of Hollywood and the Arts, but when you think about it, I mean really think about it, there is an abysmal lack of creativity coming out of the so called Artistic Communities. Movies for example, today’s blockbusters are loaded with the political apologist point of views veiled in spiffy artistic effects and bright shiny things to distract us from the glaring message, “Americans are evil tyrants who live only to subjugate that which is different and they do not understand.” Well, fuck you. Seriously, go fuck yourself and the self righteous horse you rode in on.
I am sick and fucking tired of your message of doom and gloom. The sky is falling and if we do not open our minds and our pocket books in support of the Cult of Mediocrity then we will all perish. Again, fuck you.
This country, not the politicians, not the media, the actual country defined as the people who live in it, who pay the bills, who get up everyday and go to work, raise children, pray for strength and patience… well this country is starting to wake up. It is rumbling and grumbling. It is getting pissed off and the shit is going to hit the proverbial fan. We are not the problem, we are the solution. We are the greatness that is America, not a bunch of sheep following the shepherd of the Beta is Best Ideology.
Happy Birthday Ronnie, you were The Shit and you are greatly missed.
I do give more than my fair share of Fuck Yous to Nancy Pelosi, but you know… it never gets old. It is like a warm blanket on a cold day. So here we go. Nancy, precious… do you really need to have the military fly you everywhere? Do you really need to drink like a lush? I am guessing yes.
It reads like a dream order for a wild frat party: Maker’s Mark whiskey, Courvoisier cognac, Johnny Walker Red scotch, Grey Goose vodka, E&J brandy, Bailey’s Irish Crème, Bacardi Light rum, Jim Beam whiskey, Beefeater gin, Dewars scotch, Bombay Sapphire gin, Jack Daniels whiskey … and Corona beer.
But that single receipt makes up just part of the more than $101,000 taxpayers paid for “in-flight services” – including food and liquor, for House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s trips on Air Force jets over the last two years. That’s almost $1,000 per week.
Courvoisier? She must be rollin’ with Kanye these days. Yo, Nancy was robbed! She so totally deserved that Botox of the Year award. Seriously though, the bar tab is interesting. I am disappointed with the ghetto Johnny Walker Red, surely Nancy deserves Blue Label. It is the least the American people can do for her. 2.1 million dollars over 2 years using Air Force jets as her own personal flying party bus. Nancy deserves only the best for all the hard work she is doing. Though if i were her I would not be too keen on pushing universal health care because she is gonna need a new liver if she keeps drinking like that. To expect Nancy to fly with the masses of unwashed is simply unthinkable. What if they touched her? What would happen to her fine couture clothing if she had to sit on a commercial airline seat? Oogy pleb germs might get all over her clothes!
On to more bullshit…
Athiests. Yeah, as a general rule I do not give a rat’s red ass about what anyone believes or doesn’t believe. I have had non believers in my life who were good people and who did not feel the need to tell me I was a retard for believing or accusing me of taking part in the gigantic Roman Catholic Conspiracy to rule the world. In return I didn’t tell them how sad it is that they cannot believe. Life is about personal choices and as long as those choices do not shit all over me and you live your life with integrity then we have no issues. That said, if your particular variety of Atheism is such that you are offended by a Mother Teresa stamp, then you need to just get over your fucking inflated sense of self worth. Seriously. They are telling folks to boycott USPS and encourage a letter writing campaign. Hmmm that actually may work in the USPS’s favor. I mean maybe this was the plan all along! No one writes letters anymore so they picked the Atheists to piss off. They probably had a bunch of meeting to brain storm how to increase revenues. What a bunch of fucking retards. Btw, they had no problem with the MLK stamp or the Malcolm X stamp. Apparently their religion didn’t negate their accomplishments. I wonder if Dr. King would have considered his Christianity “incidental and irrelevant” to his accomplishments? I wonder if Malcolm X would agree that Islam was not a defining force in his life? These guys must be some sort of new retarded version of Atheists.
On a depressing note:
I visited DSW today with my rewards check and there wasn’t a fucking thing I wanted in the entire store. I blame Obama. I was at the mall yesterday and I visited like ten stores and nothing nothing nothing. Everything sucks. Skinny jeans, neon colors, bright prints. Excuse me fashion trend deciders… I remember the 80s, and while it had some amazing things about it, fashion was not among them. Are you fucking kidding me? Cold shoulder shirts, leggins, boyfriend shirts with bright colors, and for the love of GOD… ballet flats. It is fucking tragic.
On a good note:
I am totally in love with Doctor Who. I am in the middle of season 2 and loving it. Some of them are really stupid but in a good way. When the BBC gets it right, they get it very right.
I have four episodes of Fringe waiting for me. I think I am going to bank about 6 of them then watch them all over a weekend! Yay! I love Walter.
On the “Fucking enough already” note:
I do not give a fuck about how much money Avatar has made. Honestly I have no desire to see it. Not because of politics, though that certainly doesn’t help, but mostly because I haven’t forgiven James Cameron for inflicting Titanic on the world. I will never forgive him for paying Celine Dion to sing that fucking song from hell. I will never forgive him for casting that perpetual childlike looking twit Leonardo in the film.
I also do not give a shit about Lost. I do not care that it is the last season. Honestly they could have added ten minutes to the last episode of season 1, sent them home, and ended the show on a high note. It has been downhill since then.
My new thing:
I have spoken often of my coworker and favorite person ever, Sarah aka Jen’s Keeper. She is a font of great expressions which are contagious. It started with, “Really?” Which she says only slightly less than she use to and I seem to say at least once an hour. A few weeks back she started with the newest benign commentary that has taken on a life of its own. We were working on something that probably was not ours to do but we ended up doing it and on a tight deadline when a box popped up on her laptop that says, “you have been infected with a trojan” She sighs, rolls her eyes and clicks the “yes I will call helpdesk box” and says in total exasperated seriousness, “I do not have time for Trojans.” The meme of the month has been “I do not have time for…” This of course has infected me and another co-worker.
A few days ago I get a text on the way into work which said, “I do not have time for motorcycles” meaning of course one was inhibiting her from driving her normal mach 3 speed to work. My text reply was, “I do not have time for cars!” This is how life goes all day, everyday. “Jennifer, we have a meeting at 1pm” grumble grumble “I do not have TIME for meetings.”
Things we have not had time for over the last few weeks.
People
Ovaries
Rain
Garage Door Opener Batteries
Runs in my stockings
Ghetto Shopping Malls
Parking Ticket Validation and Parking Garages… Parking in General.
Trying on Clothes
Blemishes
Deliverable Reporting
Deliverable Training
Exel
Visio
Microsoft
Yes, I am aware this if probably only amusing to us, but in the end, that is all that really matters. As long as we are amused, everyone lives.
Some random “What the fucks…”:
What the hell is up with Luby’s? Seriously, it is almost as expensive as going to a real restaurant. The worst part? What happened to the little lady with the tea cart? She is gone! You know what they have now? Annoying little ladies who bother you like vulture waitresses. I honestly think Sarah is going to stab one with a fork soon. “Is there anything i can get you ladies? Butter? Hot sauce? Ice?” I kick Sarah under the table to keep her from saying, “Yes, you can get the fuck away from me and go find a goddamn tea cart!” She is so awesome that way. If she is like this at 23 imagine what she will be like at 40!
Drug commercials on TV: Really? Do you feel so self conscious about the length of your eyelashes that you are going to take a drug to make them longer and thicker? A drug that can cause some pretty weird side effects? Do what any self respecting drag queen does, sweetie… visit the M.A.C. counter and get some fabulous false eyelashes! The best ones are the anti-depressants drugs. They will make you feel so much better, but by the way, if you are a guy you might get sexual disfunction. So if you are not depressed enough for medication before you take it, you dick ceasing to function normally or your inability to ejaculate will see that you soon are. Speaking of dicks, erections lasting longer than four hours might be a bad thing. Contrary to popular thought and commentary from guys I know who say things like “Four hour erection? I am not going to the emergency room! I am going to call some people and pull out the video camera!”... this cannot be a good thing. I hear they have to drain the blood from your dick with a needle. I do not have a dick and the thought makes me cringe.
Amazon: I finally get a Kindle and now Amazon and MacMillan books are in a pissing contest about pricing and some of my favorite authors are no longer available! I bought my Kindle in an effort to keep the vampire porn flowing into my home with the least amount of effort possible. You two guys need to figure this shit out. I do not have time for pissing matches.
Crying men on TV. Hell crying men in general. For fuck’s sake, get a fucking grip. Guys crying because they are eliminated from Amazing Race or Top Chef or whatever. Guy’s crying because life is just so fucking hard. Find your sack, dammit. I know we have a breast for a president, but it is soooo not ok to cry like a fucking woman. I am a woman and i do not cry as much as these bitch ass men do. I am a woman with PMS from hell and i do not cry that much. I am sorry your girlfriend doesn’t love you anymore. I am sorry you lost the game. I am sorry you are so fucking pussified you cannot just say, “Fuck it, life blows sometimes… NEXT”
Fucking pet commercials. The ones with the bulldog is fine. I think bulldogs are pretty spiffy and I am not an animal person, but their ugliness makes me smile. But there is one with a dog talking about being a “super pooper”. I do not need to tell you how much this commercial disturbs me. I do not need to hear about the shitting habits of a fucking chihuahua while I am eating dinner and watching tv. People have fucking lost their minds with their pets in the last few years. They are DOGS, people. Dogs are pets. They are DOGS! They are not children. They do not need a therapist, a spa, their own furniture, and they certainly do not need to be with you every second of of your life outside of work. Do not bring Fifi to the store, the gas station, and do not even think of bringing her with you when you visit. I do not care about your dog. If one more person at work shows me a picture they took over the weekend and it is their ruined dog in some absurd picture I am going to lose it. No it isn’t cute that he fell asleep on his back. No he isn’t cute in his little hat and booties. No she isn’t just precious in her goddamn tiara. IT IS A FUCKING ANIMAL! Feed it, play with it, let it be an animal not some sorry substitution for children which you are too damn irresponsible and self centered to breed for yourself. I am really sorry that you cannot put your kids in their cage or lock them in the laundry room while you go to work or out clubbing or whatever it is you do. Fine, do not breed, but for the love of God stop with the fucking pet insanity. Dogs should be dogs, not pitiful codependent creatures who live only to fill your idle time and make you feel like you are nurturing something.
The fucking weather. Enough already. It needs to either be HOT or COLD. This 30-50 degree temperature shifting every other day is killing me. I do not have time for weather!
Finally… Obama. SOTU… Fuck You, fuck you, and Fuck you. Tax relief for millions already. Really? Who? People who are not fucking paying taxes anyway? You are a fucking boob. Your administration is a freakin’ joke. Your congress is skating on thin ice and your term’s second half is gonna be a whole other ballgame.
I am working way too fucking much right now so this blog and all five of my loyal readers are getting hosed. I apologize and can only blame the government and of course Obama.
Good news though…
I am going to blog this weekend, God Willing and at the very least I am going to be in DC Mid Feb and I shall blog blog blog… kk?
As an act of sharing I will show you FABULOUS shoes… I am going buy these over the weekend… the ones on in the pic are a tad big so I have to track them down at another store. They are fucking bangin’ hot and all mine!! Mine I tell you!
Came across this picture at Hot Air and it made me laugh. Obama looks like he is having a Derek Zoolander moment. Corzine just looks like the cocksucker he is.
This article is about a bunch of interviews done in “research” on the topic. Talks about socially awkward men, men with intimacy issues, etc.. I was reading along thinking, is this for real? Is this broad who is writing really being serious?
One of the most interesting findings was that many believed men would “need” to rape if they could not pay for sex on demand. One told me, “Sometimes you might rape someone: you can go to a prostitute instead.” Another put it like this: “A desperate man who wants sex so bad, he needs sex to be relieved. He might rape.”
I think it is pretty well established the act of rape is really not about sex at all or the need to empty your balls. It is about violence and power and the psychopathic need to inflict not only your will on someone but humiliation. The ball emptying is just incidental. Like serial killers who get “off” on murdering people. There are wires in their brains that are not connected to the right stuff and they should all just be culled from the herd. Let’s just ignore that little morsel of fact. I would argue that the guy who says he would need to “rape” a woman if he couldn’t pay for sex is most likely raping the prostitute. The woman is just not in a position to call the cops and file charges. Also, not to be all realistic and shit, a man who needs to rape a woman is going to rape a woman regardless of the circumstances that led him to her side. Everything in that passage is utter bullshit and I expected the writer to at least mention this at some point. I got to this statement and I knew we were dealing with one of “those” women.
I concluded from this that it’s not feminists such as Andrea Dworkin and myself who are responsible for the idea that all men are potential rapists – it’s sometimes men themselves.
Wow. Just wow.
The “woman”makes a point in the article many of these women in brothels being trafficked from foreign countries. But men who are looking for a hooker are not really thinking about that now are they? I am not a member of the school of thought which says if men were not so damn horny then women wouldn’t be brought in and sold for sex. A guy buying sex is not in the same league as a person who lures women out of their unfortunate circumstances and holds them as slaves and hooks them on drugs to make money off their bodies. If all men stopped buying sex today there would be another “driving factor” for bad people to prey on other people.
One paragraph seemed to be on point to me and it wasn’t the author’s words it was a quote from an interviewed guy…
Others were clear that they paid for sex in order to be able to totally control the encounter, including Bob, who said, “Look, men pay for women because he can have whatever and whoever he wants. Lots of men go to prostitutes so they can do things to them that real women would not put up with.”
I think men pick up prostitutes for various reasons and I think there is a difference in the psychology of a guy who drives around to pick up a street hooker and a guy who calls an escort. The former has a deep desire to contract a disease and is just fucking self destructive and stupid. The latter is either doing what Bob mentions above or needs to get his balls emptied on a business trip or he just doesn’t have freakin’ time to deal with a relationship or his wife isn’t scratching an itch or whatever. I think the first guy needs a therapist and the latter just needs to wrap his dick in a titanium condom.
I could even make the argument that a guy at a bar trying to get a hook-up for the night and the woman doing the same have pretty much the doing the same thing as a call girl (not some poor Asian or Eastern Euro gal who thought she was coming to the west for a modeling deal) and John. A guy can drop a load of cash on drinks at a bar on the “hopes” he gets to take the girl home before she is too sloppy drunk to participate or he can just skip the legwork and order out. In the end it is meaningless sex with someone you will never see again and both are likely to give you herpes. If herpes is what you are after then the “path of least resistance” makes some sense, no?
I suppose I will get flack for that commentary but I stand by it.
The entire article is stupid and probably paid for by some country’s tax dollars. I suppose it is better than another fucking global warming study if for nothing other than the entertainment value.
Side note: Was talking to a guy a work who used a phrase that made me laugh out loud. I made a comment about how there are not enough Cosmos on the planet to make that guy less of a dick even if he is handsome. Then of course the subject of “beer goggles” came up and then this co-worker says, “Sometimes you go the beer goggles route as a man and sometimes you ‘Go Ugly Early’ and just save yourself the expense of getting drunk.” I had never heard the phrase “go ugly early” before. I lead a sheltered life I guess. Nonetheless it made me laugh.
No one is surprised by this, but I always enjoy the left and their willingness to forgive their own people for transgressions. No one loves a sinner more than the left; unless that sinner is a Republican of course. The left loves their philanderers, racists, and felons. Yes they do! I never cease to be amazed with the double standard. Yeah I am sure it exists on both side, but us conservatives are suppose to be narrow minded and evil. The Left is suppose to be enlightened and forever sensitive to the injustices of the world. Hell,they are so enlightened they elected a man based pretty much entirely on the fact he was black. I say this because there is simply nothing in his resume to suggest he is presidential material. We have hashed that fact over until the horse is long dead.
Harry Reid and his “negro dialect” comment is just another in a long line of racially derogatory comments from the left over the last few years. We do not have to look past his Vice President in February of 2007:
“I mean, you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy,” he said. “I mean, that’s a storybook, man.”
Yeah, Joe… I cannot think of another mainstream African-American male who is smart, clean, and speaks well. But not only did he get forgiven and barely called on the commentary, he was honored (if you want to call it that) with the Vice Presidency.
Robert Byrd former KKK Exalted Cyclops and Kleagal who has stood against just about anything related to racial equality that has come before the Senate in his career. He is old though, remember? He deserves some slack. Right? Well as recently as 2001, part of the enlightened age, he repeatedly used the reference “white n*ggers” on Fox News Sunday. But really, that doesn’t count. Besides he was on Fox News, I am sure they spiked his water bottle with evil conservative cooties or something.
The rush to defend Reid’s remarks by prominent Black Americans is fucking absurd. The President accepted his apology, bfd. Like he had a choice on that. If he had said, “Fuck you, Harry.” He would just be a bitter black man. All I know is any prominent conservative committing the same “error in judgment” they would be crucified in the media and the combined efforts of the Left would do everything possible to see their political careers over.
Saddest thing about all this? You do not even have to point it out anymore, everyone knows how pathetic it is. No one is surprised when a prominent Democrat spews some racial slur and no one is surprised with the prominent blacks in their ranks rush to defend them. Just simply pathetic.
When a man ducked past security at Newark Liberty International Airport last Sunday to kiss his girlfriend goodbye, the breach in security shut down one of the country’s busiest airports, delayed flights through Monday and prompted an intensive manhunt from New Jersey detectives that ended on Friday evening on a street in Piscataway, N.J.
He is lucky I wasn’t at Newark that day I would have beat him to death for keeping me in that god forsaken shithole for one moment longer than necessary.
Another failure in the Airport security saga we live in. Surprise! Duh. I was going through Newark once with a friend on the way to a vendor convention. We were carrying on two bags full of metal (gold chain etc) We were told we needed our bags searched and sent to a table to wait. Watched they two bitches sit and shoot the shit instead of working and our flight was being called to board. I said, “Ma’am that is our flight they are calling. Can you check our bags so we can make the flight?” She looks at me like I am insane and says, “Go ahead, you are fine.” My hand to God! Trust me, 9/11 didn’t surprise me, hell nothing that happens at Newark or any other Airport surprises me.
On Saturday, some of Mr. Jiang’s roommates described him as a “romantic” now trying to secure a lawyer after the dizzying turn of events.
I think he should be described as terminally stupid and immediately have a vasectomy and an anal probing with a hedgehog. Did I mention I hate being delayed at Newark?
The senator said the trouble the security breach caused far outweighed the punishment: 1,600 people stuck in the airport for six hours; flights delayed and an “incalculable” loss of money. And then for five days after the incident, New Jersey law enforcement officials searched exhaustively for the man caught on a grainy surveillance video, one which Sen. Lautenberg had released on Thursday.
I say hang him at High Noon in the middle of the main terminal! Fucking six hours! ugh.
“He loves her very much,” Mr. Huang said on Saturday, outside the two-story house Mr. Jiang shares with five roommates. Mr. Huang added that his friend “just wanted to say goodbye to his girlfriend, so it was a very emotional moment. I don’t think he realized what he’s doing.”
Fucking pussy. Now he can carry on his love affair from a jail cell with his new ‘boyfriend” Bubba.
How did he do it?
The video showed that Mr. Jiang was able to step past security last Sunday when a guard, identified by a law enforcement official as Ruben Hernandez, left his post. The guard has been on administrative leave since Tuesday, and he faces disciplinary action, according to the Transportation Security Administration.
Without Mr. Hernandez watching, Mr. Jiang was able to slip into an area of people who had already cleared security and embraced a woman in a puffy coat and kissed her. When security officials were alerted that someone had breached a secure area, they took steps to lock down the terminal.
Oh I sure Mr. Hernandez is not popular right now. Hell if he isn’t careful Janet Nappypants might just come down and scare him with her hairdo and fashion sense. I have to fly to DC in a few weeks and this is just another reason I a never flying through Newark again.
Back to Mr. Huang.. the poor misunderstood casanova.
“I think this man is very romantic,” Mr. Riu said.
Mr. Jiang, who comes from the Jiangxi province of China, said Mr. Huang, is a postdoctoral fellow at the Center for Advanced Biotechnology and Medicine, according to the Rutgers University Web site. He intended to find a job in Los Angeles after graduation so he could be with his girlfriend, Mr. Huang said.
He isn’t just a romantic folks… this is the act of a postdoctoral advance biomed tech and medicine guy aka geek. It is probably the only piece of ass he will ever have a chance at and he was overcome with the lure of the panties. Ugh. I will say what I say on many occasions to men who are stupid about women… “no piece of ass is worth that…”
“I just hope this doesn’t affect his future career path.”
They hope it doesn’t affect his future career? With this on his resume I am sure he can qualify to lead a TSA team or at the very least run for President of the United State. I fucking hate people.
Approximately 55 seconds into this is proof of the mad hip thingie Mr. Cooper possesses. In fact the split second glimpse is probably enough to make me go see the movie because where there is a split second there must be more!!! He dethrones previous best hip thingie King David Beckham.
A girl can never have too much hip thingie. Like guys can never get enough tits.
I watched the trailer and while I will reserve judgement on Liam as Hannibal, I will did note the guy playing Murdoch looks way too much like Owen Wilson. So much like Owen Wilson that I think the casting guys probably reallllly wanting Owen Wilson. He looks enough like him and in the airplane portion of the clip he even has the same vocal inflections as Owen Wilson a la Armageddon.
None of that however matters! Cooper has mad hip thingie. I need to start a hip thingie blog.
So, I am watching UT play because well this is Texas and my girl at work is a UT grad and if I do not watch I will be in the doghouse and she is in control of my life essentially so I am watching. It is mitigating the agony of the fact I am building a project schedule at the same time. In between admiring boys way too young for me, but still hot enough to say oooo over, and entering tasks in a schedule i am getting txts from the above mentioned Jen Keeper every 30 seconds.
We have discussed how Josh Groban shouldn’t sing the anthem they should have had a country singer like Martina McBride do it. We have discussed that even though I like red better than burnt orange I am required to cheer for UT or she will no longer uphold her duties as Jen Keeper. I commented that football butts are the best. Then we started a list…
Football butts
Baseball arms
Tennis Thighs
and of course…
Swimmer’s HIP THINGIE!
Let me know if you have any additions….
On to more stupidity…
Cell phones are getting to be sad. Really sad. Their inferiority complex over iPhone is just fucking ridiculous. I do not give a rat’s red ass about Google android or whatever the fuck it is. It is not an iPhone. Worse? That stupid commercial with the “projector” phone. Really? Who the hell is gonna use that? I mean wtf are you going to watch for the 2.5 minutes it will probably take to run the battery down? You want to give my cell phone a good function? Make it do my fucking laundry.
Back to the BCS… McCoy had five seconds of a game and got hurt? Well fuck… walk it off and get back in the fucking game. Just sayin’.
On to more random shit… Smart cars. Look I get that there are pussies in the world who buy cars like this. I just thought they were either all women or gay. Was behind one on the expressway today… not a good thing… passed the wind-up toy and looked at the driver. Big giant guy… oy. Here is the rule: If you are a male driving a SmartCar you immediately have your “man card” revoked. You might as well start wearing a tutu. In Texas a man in a SmartCar is just asking for a beatdown.
I have a fire! I have been in my condo for two years and had two fires over that time in my lovely fireplace. I have had 5 fires since Christmas! W00t!
For the record, I can tackle better than these boys are doing right now… in my stilettos. Just sayin’ Oooo a sack… see they heard me! Oh shit… nevermind… I keep getting texts that say, “pinche freshman!” “WTF?” “I will need spiked coffee to survive the office full of Aggies tomorrow!” Pobrecita…
You know what this football game needs? Vince Young, but since that isn’t an option I guess I will eat a jolly rancher.
I have been looking at the news and it is all rather stupid. Janet Oogypants wants to scan us all and see america naked. Bad idea for many reason. beyond the obvious fact it is probably totally not reliable, wtf is gonna happen if some TSA worker sees something? 9 out of 10 TSA workers I see at security are 45+ overweight women sitting on a stool or some old guy with bad knees walking you through the metal detector. Wtf are they gonna do?
Well this game blows… I am pondering watching a movie now. Hmmm
Ok… have to finish this damn schedule… will write something that matters tomorrow.
Leslie W on 
SB Smith on 
Brad on 
Wadamai Gunadu on 
Faith+1 on 
