TDFU: September Sucks Ass

By jen

I would like to start out with a big Fuck You to September.  I hate September!  There is only a few major bright spots in the entire month, Pay day at the beginning and Daughter No. 2’s birthday at the end (a few more at the bottom of the post).

What a fucking shit month.  Work is INSANE.  Home has been INSANE what with all the death flu and whatnot.  I once enjoyed my browsing of headlines and blogs but the only thing i see is more and more fucking stupid fucking shit.  Everywhere I look and everything I hear is just one long chorus of shit courtesy of a President and congress out of control.

I for one am overwhelmed with a warm fuzzy sense of security since Fuknut is at the UN right now with his herd of unicorns trying to make this world full of bunnies and care bears for me.  Is it his fault that pesky Almondjoyhadine oogy man from Iran is being all cranky with his uranium and how much he has?  Seriously, I have total faith it i s all for medical use.  I feel safe though, Fuknut has said that he will not tolerate Iran with a bomb.  I heard him, yes I did.  His sweet words of optimism have purged me of my absurd realism and given me a new lease on life!  /end sarcasm.  Fuck you.  I would not give this bastard this keys to my car much less trust him with national security.  What a fucking bunch of idiots we have in this country that elected this moron.  For fuck’s sake some of his biggest fans are Chaves and Kadaffyfuckingduck!  This alone should make the Americans who voted for this douche shit themselves. That would however require some concept of reality which we are all aware they lack.  Quick update on the nuclear world… Chavez wants to play now!  w00t!

I am watching Nickelback Live at Sturgis on Netflix right now and that is the one reason I am not smashing things.  Did I mention I hate September?  I try not to look directly at Chad Kroeger because the guy looks like my ex husband way too much; just shave his head.  Of course I would like to thank Brian again for pointing this out to me.

Onward…

St. Teddy of the Naughty bits needs 20 million for his Kennedy Institute; at least according to John Kerry.  Link

WASHINGTON – A large military spending bill moving through Congress contains a little-noticed outlay for Boston that has nothing to do with national defense: $20 million for an educational institute honoring late Senator Edward M. Kennedy of Massachusetts.

This little earmark in Defense bill seems to be drawing a bit of attention:

“Whatever beneficial value civic education may have, it’s hard to see why the Defense Department should pay for it,’’ said Laura Peterson, a senior policy analyst at the nonpartisan Taxpayers for Common Sense in Washington. “It would seem the location of this hefty earmark has more to do with the powerful position of its sponsor than [the Defense Department’s] responsibility to educate elementary school children.’’

This watchdog groups are so fucking literal.  Defense Department/Education Department they are right by each other in the Alphabetical list of Gov Departments, no?  Close enough for government work as they say…  Teraaaazaaah’s  Bitch has this to say:

Kerry strongly defended the insertion of the $20 million earmark yesterday. He requested that it be included in the $360 billion defense budget, he said, to recognize Kennedy’s long tenure on the Senate Armed Services Committee.

Well if that is the fucking case, I would like my long tenure working with the US Armed Services recognized by having someone punch this Kerry douche in the throat.  Could I have a second on that?  Barring that, why don’t we actually spend on this Defense money on something radical like… FUCKING DEFENSE.

Update on Nickelback Concert on TV.  Drunk biker’s and the Old Lady’s trying to dance the dirty grind to Photograph is amusing.  I am also being forced to admit Chad Kroeger is hot.  He cannot help it if  he looks like my ex husband.  He needs tattoos though, to make this like really great.  Anyway…

In case you needed another reason to ad to the 1 million others why the UN is a fucking joke, I give you Colonel Khadafyduck.

After struggling to turn Khadafy’s insane ramblings at the UN into English for 75 minutes, the Libyan dictator’s personal interpreter got lost in translation.

“I just can’t take it any more,” Khadafy’s interpreter shouted into the live microphone – in Arabic.

At that point, the U.N.’s Arabic section chief, Rasha Ajalyaqeen, took over and translated the final 20 minutes of the speech.

“His interpreter just collapsed – this is the first time I have seen this in 25 years,” another U.N. Arabic interpreter told The Post.

Proving the point that there is only so much bullshit one man can take before he just says, FUCK YOU and passes out.  Poor bastard.  He probably had to smell this goatfucking crazy bastard on the flight over and it started the process of the breakdown.  Fucking circus sideshow, the UN.  Want to cut spending?  Fucking toss the UN out of the country with all their fucking entourages and their fucking shit, and tell them to never come back.  Just unfund the whole goddamn piece of shit corrupt organization and see how long they last.  Maybe Almondjoyhadine can host them in Iran at the super safe nuclear plant of his.  At the very least it would render them all sterile/impotent which would be the first truly humanitarian act from that farce of an organization in half a century;  goatkind and mankind would be blessed.

Nickelback Update:  Dirty filthy song time… Figure You Out.  I am almost happy now.  I fucking get a kick out of this song.  Cannot imagine why.

Not all of September was terrible… there was my daily dose of   Chris Muir and today’s strip made me chuckle aloud at work…

The Superficial gave us Kill it!  Kill it With Fire! With a brilliant Warriors reference in it for the old folks out there.

Fox gave us another amazing episode of Glee and All the Single Ladies…

Hah I was sold when they did Kanye..

Wasn’t sure I would like this show but I love it.  It is obvious the demographic is across the board.  As a child of the 80’s this shows is fucking brilliant as a mom of three little ones I say this is not appropriate for the young ones.  LOVE IT.

Oh yeah and you know what else happened this September?  Fringe started this week and you know who else is back?  GIBBS!

Best five minutes on TV this week!

Yeah, he is fucking hot.

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