Ten Shitty Things about 2009

By jen

Ok so here is a list post of sorts…

Ten Worst Things about 2009 in no particular order and I am certain I have forgotten a great many thing. 

1.  Prince Fuknut and and his merry band of amoral surrender monkeys.

2. Laurell K. Hamilton’s  Divine Misdemeanors:  I was really looking forward to this book.  I cannot read the Anita Blake books anymore but I have always loved the Merry Gentry series.  I think that has come to an end.  She should have just added another 4 chapters to Swallowing Darkness and called the series complete.  I blame the publishers for asking for more books and the author for not just taking the series in another direction.

3. Daughter No. 3 getting sick.

4. The fact all a terrorist has to do to avoid being killed is to get caught commiting an act of terrorism on US soil; then he gets all the rights and liberties of a citizen of the very country he wants to see burn.  Barry-O is a fucking piece work. 

5.  Tiger Woods fiasco.  I do not give a flying fuck if he is banging his dog, his nanny, and the Gardener… all at the same time.  Why is this news?  Why does anyone care?  Does anyone care?  Guy at work said, “His wife is stupid if she stays with him!”  I said, “She can take half and leave or keep it all and stay.”  He says, “What?!”  I said, “I might divorce him if I were his wife, but I would probably just say, ‘Here is how it is gonna play out, Precious.  You will move into the East Wing of the estate.  You can see your kids whenever you want.  You will hand over possession of all the bank cards and you will not make a single fucking comment about a single fucking thing I buy… EVER.  And, btw… “the candy store” is close for you.  If that is not acceptable I will take my half of all your shit and you can pay me 100k a month in child support and pay the mortgage etc.  It is up to you, loverboy.”  It is that simple.  win/win for the wife.   But Jennifer, she was publicly humiliated!  Yeah? Best cure for that?  Christian Louboutin, 2010 Maserati Gran Turismo, and never having to worry about a single fucking financial issue again in your life!  Cry a little, sweetheart, then just realize you are never going to have to worry about providing for your children… EVER.  Small price.

6. Universal Healthcare actually getting voted on.  What the fuck is wrong with this country?  NO ONE WANTS THIS!  If people do not get off their asses this year and vote every single one of these cocksucking piece of shit politicians out of office I am going to fucking lose my mind. 

7.  Swine Fucking Flu!  I think they should name it the Chicken Little Flu because they have cried the Sky is falling in an effort to distract us from everything else going to hell and when the sky does fall, no one is going to pay attention.

8. Hollywood in general: Avatar, Kanye, and the hoards of libtards screeching about whatever the fuck it is they think they know but really have no clue about.

9. Janet The Sequel: No my first name aint, Baby. Its Janet… Ms. Napolitano if your nasty... Redefining Success, One Terrorist Attack at a Time! 

10.  Keith Olbermann sets record for holding down a job while deep in the throes of Tertiary syphilis